3 steps forward…

sterling’s most recent milestones (11.3 – 11.7):
<pictures at bottom!>

tuesday, november 3, 2009:
*sterling slept between us (read: not ON one of us) for the first time!  may not sound like a huge accomplishment… but for those of you who have had a 18 lbs. child lay on their chest 12 hours a night for 2 weeks straight will consider this an absolute victory!

thursday, november 5, 2009:
*sterling had his first pediatric visit.  like us, the pediatrician was impressed with his development.  and we’re excited to report that he’s totally healthy!  he’ll be undergoing a few tests in the following week – so please keep him in your prayers.
*sterling took his first unassisted steps!!!  thinking he was actually holding onto jennifer’s hands he took 3 steps towards his mommy!

friday, november 6, 2009:
*sterling received his first (in america) haircut.  mommy butchered it a little but the ultimate goal – shorter hair – was accomplished… and he still has both ears – success!

saturday, november 7, 2009:
*sterling met our dog, mei li (pronounced: may lee) for the first time. unlike mei li, sterling was not so excited about the meeting, but is now willing to share the same roof!
*sterling slept in the pack-n-play for 1/2 the night… unfortunately around 1 am he woke up & without thinking jennifer immediately picked him up to soothe him.  this of course negated the idea that he is supposed to sleep in the pack-n-play.  trusting that with enough time, sterling will adjust to his bed & jennifer will be trained to comfort him in it!

and this just in:
*sterling has a new tooth, bottom row. current count: 4 on top, 3 on bottom.

saving the environment… 1 diaper at a time

yes, it’s true.  we’re tree huggers… kind of.  people still come first in our books, but we are very mindful of how we use the earth’s resources so there will be plenty left for the following generations.  i would hope that everyone knows that we cannot keep doing things the way we’ve always been doing them.  if everyone in the world lived like westerners, we’d all be in a heep of trash trouble.

a heep… that’s why we decided to go re-usable in the diaper department.  when considering what pottying method to use at the beginning of sterling’s journey – there were 3 viable options.  disposable, re-usable or no diaper (or on demand pottying).  we’ve been around option 3 for the past 5 years and have seen way too many babies poop and pee on pants, beds, couches, restaurant floors, cars, etc.  option 3 was a no go.

option 1 was too expensive and incredibly hard on the landfills. some argue that option 2 is also hard on the environment due to the amount of washing necessary, but we are in houston, tx now, and we have more water than we know what to do with here – thus this was the more environmental option for us.  we went with the Mommy’s Touch one-size-fits-all/all-in-one (aio) version.

pro’s & con’s:  disposable diapers are convenient in that you just throw them away, but you have to continually go to the store to buy new ones.  it takes up to 500 years for them to degrade.  cloth diapers take some work in that they have to be washed and dried, but nothing goes into the trash.  at the end of their use (up to 3 children for 3 years each) they can be discarded like an old t-shirt and spend only a few years in the dump.  some say re-usable diapers use too much energy to wash and dry.  while they do use energy to wash, we line dry – takes 12-24 hours.  containment ability: both huggies and Mommy’s Touch are the same.  ease of removal and installation: same.

the second biggest factor for me, however, was the money.  we are averaging 5 diapers/day at the moment.  we have been informed that we can go to as few as 3/day in his 3rd year of life.  let’s use those as calculations for cost comparisons. we found the absolute cheapest possible off-brand diapers we could find at wal-mart.  using those costs @ $6/28 diapers, that’s 21.5 cents/diaper @ 5 per day for his first year with us (his 2nd year of life)… it will cost us about $392 for diapers his first year (assuming the prices don’t change).  we bought 20 Mommy’s touch diapers at $22 each.  total of $440.  At 3 diapers/day his 3rd year of life we estimate that it will cost us $235 for the year, and a grand total of $625.  that means about a $185 savings when compared to the cheapest (and not-so-good diapers). if we compare with name brands that don’t leak as much, the savings are much higher. 

now, we hope to have more children and from there it is all pure savings.  using these cheap wal-mart diapers, a 2nd child would cost us $1,100 just for diapers… but going the re-useable diaper route, that cost wouldn’t exist. 

so, our Mommy’s Touch diapers have the same leak protection as name brand diapers (and more so than off-brands), they don’t fill the land fills, they work from birth to 3 years old (although it does make our baby’s booty look big right now - ha! ), we don’t have to run to the store to get any, they pay themselves off in just over a year with a 1 year old (the payback is even faster with a newborn), and they support stay-at-home mothers intstead of large corporations since these are all made in the usa by stay-at-home moms.  these diapers do require more work in that they have to be washed and dried, but it’s worth it so far. 

in addition, we plan to take these with us overseas where the acquisition of disposables is even more inconvenient and we will be even more thrilled with them then.  besides, it’ll be nice to not have to be labeled as “wealthy foreigner”… as none of our friends could afford to buy diapers for their little ones.

playing with knives…

when mommy’s away, the boys will play…

(click picture to see video)

all american! ~sterling creed davis

sterling wrote:  “ksdpoiufmW90CMlKMCC9MKlpALKSDJFMCM;poajmcfcaoijsdfiauercmkldopc  j p0ikAKDF OK;LDF AKPDF[ Q9W   A”

translation:  i figure it’s time i put a few words out there on my own behalf.  i’m tired of everyone writin’ about me as if i’m not even able to read.  ok, so i can’t read yet, but i am tech savvy so even i can post on a blog!

i want to formally announce that i am “all american!”  and proud of it!  i heard some cool lyrics that pretty much sum up my feelings… “proud to be an american, where at least i know i’m free…”

in commemoration of my new status i got me some cool new digs.

daddy says they look a little nasa-ish with all the extra material these reuseable diapers have.

mommy says they fit just right.  even so, i think her sight is a little off ’cause the flag wasn’t ‘xactly sewn on straight.  so i’m not so sure i can trust her fashion sense just yet.

so this is the “all american” lowdown.  daddy & mommy told me they had to fill out lots of forms before they ever knew who i was, asking america for permission to make me an immigrant.  word is they had to do this several times.  i’m sure they didn’t mind though… ’cause they knew i’d be worth it!

then on my official “adoption day” my immigration status became their responsibility.  so the 3 of us headed down to guangzhou where ms. maria made an appointment for me to get a US visa.  that was the easy part.  daddy really had the hard part as he had to lug all our luggage around the train stations.  it was then that i think daddy really paid his dues!

ms. maria was also really amazing and she finagled her way into making sure i could become a “sworn citizen” that very day!  it was cool how it all worked out.  so with all the hub bub of daddy & mommy trekking across town with me i decided to chill.  after all, it is fun seeing them to do all the work.  problem was i chilled a bit too much and during the ceremony i dozed off.  fortunately, daddy & mommy assured me later that they had everything covered.

the final seal of my immigration approval happened when we landed in chicago.  somewhere along the way i heard somethin’ about me becoming a citizen as soon as i touch US soil.  well, you better believe i was happy when i touched that special US soil… but i was really regrettin’ not knowing how to kiss yet… ’cause if i did, i would have kissed that special US soil ground!

mommy again reassured me that i’d have plenty of time to get some dirt in my face… and mentioned something about babies eating dirt.  i let that go ’cause i thought her comment was a bit stereotypical.

so after daddy grabbed all the luggage off the airport spinny thing mommy carried me to immigration.  lots of people i’d never seen before congratulated us but one of them said, “good luck.”  it was then that i started gettin’ nervous.  what if all this reassuring daddy & mommy had been doing had lured me into trusting them with one of the biggest things that was ever gonna happen to me?  i mean really, were they competent enough to handle MY immigration?

so i took a chill pill and sauntered up to the desk (mommy had my back… and my whole body for that matter in the snugli) where a man stared blankly at me and my paperwork… then i heard that magic sound – the loud thud of the “approval” stamp.  of course, i acted like i was keepin’ my cool the whole time, but i tell you, there’s nothing like becoming an american!

so now daddy says i’m, “all american!”  and to that i say, “i’m all proud!”

“s” stands for sterling…

and snugli…
a huge hit with sterling & a lifesaver for daddy & mommy!
and stroller…
an acceptable mode of transportation, with clear preference that it constantly be in motion!



and swing…
a nice way to chill out, but is most fun when mommy & daddy tickle me!



and slide…
totally indifferent, as you can see, mommy was much more enthusiastic!



and sitting in the feeding chair…
again, cheerios work as the magic charmer!

and our greatest accomplishment, the car seat!
we’ve gone from desperation (to be held) screaming to a few grunts when getting in or out of the car seat… success!

that’s a lot of the letter “s“ and a lot of firsts!

yeah sterling!

we’re home!

we came home to a wonderful “S.S. New Arrival” balloon & sign as well as many gifts of food inside! special thanks to those who provided so lovingly for us… and for those who helped by dusting & mowing our homestead!

it was quite the homecoming with nainai & yeye (jarod’s parents) & a surprise debut made by cousin josie & her parental units (thanks aunt niki & uncle jason for making that possible) meeting us at the airport!

the following morning the whole gang – both sets of grandparents & josie with her posse – showed up for some fun… even with jet lag we all had a blast!

wow! what a union!

meeting cousin josie for the first time

yeye with josie, nainai with sterling

laolao, mommy (jennifer) & sterling

josie & sterling checking out the beautiful outdoors

sterling pushing josie in the walker…

and josie enjoying the ride!

sterling making one of his funny faces

family… it’s a good thing!

trains!

there’s a lot of people in china.  that’s nothing new to anyone, but one of the challenges china faces is how to move so many people from one place to another.  we are pleased to say that this is one thing that is done very well.  trains, planes, buses, boats, subways, taxis, bicycles, richshaw’s, etc.  you name it, and there’s a mode of transportation that will get you from one place to the next. 

one vehicle we like to take to get long distances is trains, and with the improvement in the economy, there’s lots of choices to chose from.  trains are inexpensive, dependable, and they have a unique culture to them not found on other modes of transport.  during our this past trip to go get sterling, we took 3 different trains that took us from the distant northeast, all the way to the very south.  we had a variety of seats and beds and avariety of speeds.  we want to introduce this system to you quickly so that you, too, can experience a little bit of mass transit in china.

this is a 4 part series of videos, click on each picture to see each video.

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

 

 

 

 

attachment & anxiety…

we have been surprised & oh so thankful that sterling is bonding well to both of us.  it is obvious (y)our prayers for all of our hearts to be prepared for each other have been heard!  praise be to our Father in heaven!

even though sterling is attaching well to both of us we’ve noticed a few things that cause us to give way to caution…

our hope in writing this post is not only to inform you of attachment issues with adopted children as a whole (click here), but also to explain our own situation.

in the past 2 weeks with sterling we have changed locations 3 times.  of course, that makes 4 for him if you include leaving the orphanage.  with each new “move” we’ve been amazed at how well he adapts to new surroundings… and meeting new people.  however, we’ve also noticed that his level of seperation anxiety increases with each move.  he wakes up more in the middle of the night and seems to panic if we’re not by his side.  during his nap times he sits up and cries and often requires a lot of comforting (read: touching) until he can calm himself down and fall back asleep.  last night he even crawled off the edge of the bed as he searched for us.

though his seperation anxiety doesn’t seem to be prohibiting his attachment with us, naturally we are concerned as he often looks paniced if say we both are out of his line of vision.

in addition we’ve noticed another trend that causes us even more concern.  it appears that sterling is very attracted to men… and desperately wants to “charm” them.  he’s quick to laugh and even reach for them.  this is quite disconcerning as we want his first attachment & his main source of approval to come from us alone.  interestingly enough, sterling will not readily go to other women, but seems to put on a show for men.

all this to say, as we prepare to board our plane back to the states we are all too aware that he will face yet another transition.  we have decided what is best for sterling during this time is to foster situations in which he attaches well to us.  so our parenting may not look familiar to you… but his best interest is at the heart of our actions.

with that said, we will be using a snugli much of the time we are out with sterling.  he will be physically attached to one of us.  even if sterling reaches out for you, please don’t take him.  we know it will be hard to resist scooping him up into your arms… as many of you have prayed for him for YEARS.  we recognize this service of love for him and for us… but we also ask that you allow him this time (none of us can presume how long) for him to adjust well to his new life.  and we are choosing, at least for now, not to place him the care of others.  ie. he will not be going to child care

we also ask that even if you don’t agree or understand our decisions that you would respect them.  and please continue to pray that we would all quickly form a healthy attachment…

it is our desire that sterling would first know our Father’s love… that he would have no doubts about our love… and that he too would experience the love of our faith family!

and always, thank you for your patient love towards us… and thank you for extending it to our lil’ sprout!

treat!

since we spent halloween on the east side… and especially since we didn’t want to scare the bejeebers out of sterling with an introduction to the world of costumes, we went with this simple motif… 

of course it took a few bribes treats to actually get these pictures.
nevertheless, he’s the most awesome treat we’ve ever received!!!

 

*thank you nai nai (mom d) for making such a special shirt!

a very, very busy day

today was a day of firsts… and a day of see-ya-laters. 

it was our first time to:

1. take a baby onto an airplane!  we learned that it takes twice as long to go through security.  we also thought we knew how to pack since we are such seasoned travelers, but we found out that having a kid while traveling changes all of the rules.  ha!

2. leave the shanghai pudong airport to actually go into the city.  all of the international influence makes cities like this not “real china.”  it feels just like another big city.  even so, we did, however, love visiting with some friends who now live here!

3. see things that are considered delicacies elsewhere in asia as common place.  for example, we saw papa johns, pizza hut, starbucks, cold slab ice cream, dairy queen, subway sandwich, kfc, and mcdonald’s all at one subway stop!  beijing doesn’t even boast these kind of options!

it was very busy in that we got up early (5 am) to fly from guangzhou to shanghai… which meant we had to say ”see ya later” to some very dear freinds of ours, then coordinate with the little local hotel we booked in shanghai to come pick us up, check in at the little hotel (i think we’re the first customers ever) and then take a 1 hour trip into town using 3 different transportation methods, visit with a very special friend who is like a brother to us, take some pictures, hunt for more baby formula, and get back so that sterling could sleep early since he got up 2 hours early & missed his nap!  all-in-all, it was an action packed day, and now we look forward to getting on an airplane headed for the states so that sterling can meet his extended family!